10 Reasons to Not be Happy All the Time
- If we were happy all the time, we would not know contrast. Without times of unhappiness, we would have not reference for happiness.
- Contrasting emotions are away of experiencing our own morality and the way we develop our own moral compass.
- Life is not meant for constant happiness. Knowing half our emotional life will be uncomfortable helps us stay aligned with reality.
- Trying to be happy all the time is impossible and wears us out. Instead, accepting the nature of duality in the human experience can empower us to use our energy more constructively.
- The campaign to be happy all the time sets us up to deny or resist the tragedy in the world. We fear if accepting this reality means we are condoning it. In actuality, it’s when we resist it that we give away our power and authority over it.
- It is not happiness that builds character, resilience, maturity and wisdom. These are the fruits that only grow through times we wouldn’t call happy.
- What makes our lives meaningful are not things that feel happy in the moment. Whether it’s being a parent when our kids are challenging, being a partner in sickness and health, taking care of those we love even when it’s inconvenient, working hard or working out.
- Happiness denies the value of negative emotions. Fear can protect us and those we love. Guilt can inform adjustments in our actions that feel more aligned with our values. Anger can alert us to boundary violations. Loneliness can reflect our value on connection. Sadness can reflect our depth of love and care for others.
- There’s evidence that too much positive emotion can make people inflexible when facing new, unexpected challenges. (Barbara Fredrickson)
- The attempt to feel and project happiness all the time mutes what makes you uniquely human. The effort to do so will force you to skim the surface of life and disconnect you from yourself and others.
